Life Goes On
by twistedr0ses
Summary: The Hilarious Chronicles of Dante and Virgil.Suffering college n demonhunting r Dantes Daily Routine...Oh, n dont forget flirting! n Virgil,as usual keepin it cool as ever when troubles arises.CHAPTER 3 IS UP!PLZ CHECK IT OUT!
1. Ad Math or Advanced Mathematics?

Disclaimer: I do not own 'Devil may cry'. I do not own Dante and Virgilnor do I own any of its characters. I only own my made up characters.

This is my first fan fiction, please be nice and I hope you would like it:)

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"Man! I hate school," Dante complains while he pulled out a thin red textbook and furiously slammed the locker door shut.

"Cheer up Dante! School's just for…," Virgil squints at his blue wristwatch "seven hours… Before you know it we'll be hacking and slashing demons in a dark alleyway" Virgil tried to cheer Dante up.

In the background, walking past them a scrawny guy with round black-framed glasses and curly dark hair, with checked pants which were pulled up high to his upper-belly-button-area instantly paused in his tracks when he heard Virgil say 'hacking and slashing demons in a dark alleyway', with absolute curiosity the nosy geek moved towards the twins and started fiddling with a locker's combination, the locker which was next to Virgil's locker. Virgil who was leaning on his locker didn't notice the geeky guy behind him and continued talking to Dante.

It was the twins first day in their new college, Virgil is so excited and over hyped; Last night Virgil was running around their tiny apartment(which is also 'Devil May Cry') and packing his new blue backpack with knowledgeable stuff, and throwing money over huge school books.

While Virgil was so enthusiastic about college Dante's face was/is twisted into a frown since last night; complaining to his older twin how much he hated high school and vowed then to never go to college but Virgil wanted to be a college graduate instead of finishing his education till high school and starting a cheap, low job like opening a shop of devil hunting like Dante wanted to. But after long angry arguments, they agreed to each other by making a deal. The deal was: Dante has to go to college with Virgil and then after college they would go demon hunting together; and would continue fighting demons until midnight (ONLY UNTIL MIDNIGHT). Virgil agreed. Dante agreed (although internally cursing Virgil). Then it was settled. Deal Made. Case Closed.

"Dante it's not like I want to stay in scho…uh..I mean college forever; it's just that we're still in a maturely young age and we shouldn't always waste precious time constantly hunting and fighting demons," Virgil started to explain Dante about life and time, like a serious father would tell his bothersome playing-with-life-and-not-going-to-school son.

"Hello! Earth to Virgil!" Dante waved his hand in front of Virgil's astonished face.

"We're half-demons, immortals; in other words: we can't die, remember?" Dante nearly yelled.

Virgil was bothered by Dante's reaction and didn't want him to yell harder so he just disgustingly swiped off Dante's hand and continued "Of course I remember! I'm the older and the wiser one here!"

"Oh yeah! Then how can we" sarcastically making so-called gesture "'WASTE PRECIOUS TIME'!"

Behind them the hidden intruder listened and gasped at the Sparda twins loud arguments, still listening with one hand clutched on an 'Advanced Mathematics' reference book and the other hand on his mouth which was open in awe because he heard the word 'half-demons' and 'Immortals'. The nerd thought that these guys were freaks from the Looney bin or just plain weird.

"Okay well, maybe we aren't WASTING time…but going to college is a better way to SPEND time!" Virgil furiously yelled; it was a good thing for Virgil that nobody was around in the hallway or else people would have circled them and would've been chanting 'fight,fight,fight!' Virgil didn't want that happen at least not on their first day. But it was a wonder why the hallway was empty.

"And it's just two bloody years; two years are just gonna pass by like snapping of the fingers!" Virgil was now breathing fire.

Dante snapped his fingers like a miracle would occur

"hmmmm…" Dante rubbing his chin "why didn't these crappy two years fly by?

"Arrgghhhhh…" Virgil slapped his forehead in aggravation.

An irritated Virgil looks at his wristwatch one more time while looking at it widens his eyes "Oh shit! It's 8:20! We're Late, Class started 20 minutes ago! Shit! Shit! Shit!" with every 'shit' he hits his fist on the locker door, casting a small dent.

"So, we wasted time arguing that 'We're wasting time'?" Dante was leaning against his locker with crossed arms and a 'chilled' expression.

"Shut Up and stop acting stupid Dante! We're Late on our first day!" and unnoticing the sneaky freckle-faced intruder who was just behind him; Virgil quickly paces down the glossy white-polished floor hallway.

Dante jogs behind Virgil, following him.

_hmmm... why's Dante following me? _Virgil then decided to ask him "What's your first class Dan?"

"Ad Math." Dante simply replies.

"You mean, 'Advanced Mathematics'?" Virgil asked puzzled.

"Yeah that…" Dante nods.

"Great! That means we're having the first period together!" He Snatches Dante's arm and pulls him to the hallway on the right…little did they know that the sneaky geek also followed them…

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**Later in Ad Math Class**

An elderly bald, fat male teacher who was once sitting started to bang the surface of the table with a white-board wiper to quite down the students who were cracking jokes and chatting.On the whiteboard was written 'Mr. Smith'

"Settle down class! Settle down! Today we will study about the 'The Mangoes Problem', I want t---- -

"'The Mangoes Problem'? What the hell is that!" Dante blurted out.

"I'll tell you kid, but first you have to shut your trap and listen carefully!"

Dante crosses his arms and sulks thinking---_whoa this teacher's mean! He's telling me to shut my trap! No one tells me to shut my tra---I mean my mouth! Not even Verg----uh..forget it…_

"Ok class before I was rudely interrupted…" glares at Dante "…students, I would like you to turn the pages of your math book to 102, chapter number 13, exercise number 11…

Dante saw Virgil eagerly flipping pages of his math book "This is getting interesting…"

Virgil who was sitting in front of Dante (and in the first row) leaned forward to pay attention to every word the fat blob was going to say.

Dante rolled his eyes and fidgeted hesitatingly in his seat thinking----_interesting? Arrhhhhhhhhggg! I hate ad Math! I even hate the stupid, plain, simple math…but vergil...sheesh…he likes everything I hate!_

The teacher with the bulging stomach coughed loudly and continued

"One night the King couldn't sleep, so he went down into the royal kitchen where he found a basket full of mangoes. He was hungry, so he ate 1/6 of the mango---

Virgil rises up his hand "Ummm, I was wonde--

"Be Quiet! Let me finish first!" bellowed the blob.

Virgil 'tsked' embarrassingly and rolled his eyes

Behind him he could hear Dante snickering evilly----_Virgil, you smart mouth!_

Virgil thought----_why that bastard!_

"Later that night, the Queen was hungry and she couldn't sleep….blah blah..blah" the teacher continued speaking his Gibberish…

"..Royal kitchen..blab blah blah …..Mangoes…blab blah ate….blahblab…princess ate the mangoes…..then...finally..blah blah dog ate ½ of mangoes….blah blahblbblahb..."

Dante could only hear the fat obnoxious teacher blabbering away continuously in the background and out of the blue a thought came to his mind---_hmmm do cat eat mangoes? I don't know…hmmm…might as well ask vergy…_

He leans forward and constantly pokes Virgil "Hey, Vergy..Vergy… unfortunately Virgil didn't seem to feel Dante's finger poking him in the back so Dante decided to raise his voice a little

"Hey Virgil you poopiehead!"

The teacher stopped suddenly when he heard 'poopiehead'; he was so infuriated that he looked as if he was about to explode any second---

"Sssshhhhh, quiet you troublemaker! You interrupted me three times, count em' THREE darn times! And that is the limit, mister!"

Dante surprisingly looked at the now red-as-brick faced teacher---_oh my god! He looks like a fat red jelly! ----_and snickers silently.

"And as a punishment you'll be the first to answer the question: How many mangoes were originally in the basket the night before?"

Dante stopped snickering "Huh?" He blinked---_Oh shit! I don't know the damn answer! I wasn't paying attention! Arrghhh… _

"Don't act as if you don't know the answer, young man!"

Dante's mind was swarming with total perplexity

"I—uh—he-but—I—umm…

Luckily Virgil comes to the rescue "Sir, I know the answer" rising up his hand politely "its '18', 18 mangoes were left in the basket because everyone ate three…" he said with total ease

Dante amazingly looked at Virgil. Virgil smiled (not evilly). Dante then grinned at him and thought---_Wow! What is the world coming to? Firstly, the oddities of not getting a free coke with the 'free coke pizza deal'. Second, Christmas commercials coming in September and now Virgil coming to my rescue!...Life **IS** full of surprises._

The teacher stared at him for about 5 seconds then his moustache twitched and his once awful frown curved into a satisfied smile "Wow…quick thinking—uh…." Waiting to hear Virgil's name

"Virgil, sir; Virgil Sparda" Virgil quickly responds

"Quick thinking, Sparda. That was surely the fastest response I have ever seen in my class since…a long time ago…Virgil you have such a quick sharp thinking… I'm so proud of you..."The teacher's eyes gleamed with happiness. Everyone including Dante was shocked by the teacher's abrupt positive reaction towards Virgil while with the other students the teacher treated them roughly.

"Thank you, sir." Virgil grinned

Mr. Smith smiled at him gleefully and said "Since a certain someone left, this class has been dead…nobody took serious interest in my studies anymore"

"Oh, sorry to hear sir" Virgil pretended to look disheartened…

and succeeded.

Dante thinking with a bit of jealously---_humph, Virgil should be in the dramatics class. He's always tryin to put on an act…_

"The students took my class like it was a big joke..."

"But siiiiirrr, what about me? I am still your favorite student, right!" right in the front and next to Virgil sat the nosy geek who heard their private conversation earlier.

Smith looks at the geek and frowns a little "oh yes, except Ernie...only he took my studies seriously…anyway, Virgil, Welcome to the Ad Math Class…"

"But Sir, don't you mean 'Advanced Mathematics'?"

Dante thinking---_Oh brother, not again!_

Mr. Smith laughs "kid, where're you living? Still in the olden times…'Ad Math' is an abbreviation, my boy!

Dante groans---_ughhhh…this teacher is full of cheese…_

"Oh I see…" Virgil said sheepishly

"Yes, Virgil… despite the fact you interrupted me continuously…yet you have awakened me from sadness…

Virgil grinned and waited patiently for him to continue

"And as a reward I will dismiss the class early!"

"CLASS DIMISSED!" Mr. Smith announced

Virgil was now smiling from ear to ear

Everyone excluding Dante broke into a triumph "Whooooohooooooo! Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Whooooo!" then they jumped to their feet and dashed out the classroom door towards freedom

Except Dante who looked at Virgil shook his head and silently walked out with hands in his jeans pockets.

"Thank you, Sir." Virgil smiled at the teacher unnoticing Dante.

"Your most welcome, Virgil." The teacher patted him on the shoulder.

**

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****In the Hallway** (after Virgil did some talking with the Mr. Smith) 

Virgil walks out the classroom with a warm smile and sighed happily "what class next?" he asked himself.

Dante was leaning against the wall outside the Ad Math class; waiting for Virgil. When he saw him came out he pretended to look at the wall clock and then shifting his gaze at his brother he said "So, the 'Teacher's Pet' finally here?"

"Dante, stop acting childish, we're not in high school anymore." Virgil said----_what's his problem?_

Before Dante opened his mouth to respond; someone behind him grabbed his shoulder and said:

"Nice job Virgil!"

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Thankz for reading. Please tell me what it was like:) 


	2. The Wrath Of The Beast

Disclaimer: I don't own DMC or any of its characters. I just own my made-up characters:)

Special Thanks to rose-mirror21 and Cat-the-devilhunter for their nice reviews:D

Before I start, I have to say a few things concerning this fiction obviously; first my apologies to you about the last chapter, because it was untitled and had a few mistakes, secondly I would really appreciate it if yall would take some time to review, because I really want to know what you think of it and tell me if something's wrong. And the last thing is that I'm shortening the college stuff so the twins can also spend some time elsewhere. The Summary is written below; please read it before proceeding to the story. Thank you loads! Hope you would like it!

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Summary: Two weeks had gone by since the twins started college. In these days Dante and Virgil are well-known. The guy who mistakened Dante for Virgil was C.J, he came to thank him for the Ad math class because of him they got they whole period off (and yeah Dante got really pissed off when C.J called him Virgil, they into a fight and even got detention by the…Math teacher) Eventually, Virgil befriended with C.J and some other three guys.

Sparda and Eva; as I forgot to mention previously are in vacationing in Hawaii, Dante and Virgil doesn't know why, when Dante asked his dad he just responded that 'they need some time alone'…

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** .Chapter Two. **

** The Wrath of the Beast**

"I can't do it!" Dante threw the pencil down in total frustration and deliberately banged his head on the surface of his work table.

THACCKK!

"Owwwwww…" he rubbed the stinging sore spot. Dante was writing an essay which was really hard…in his opinion. It was seven in the evening, but as it was in the middle of December the sky was almost cloudy and darkness was approaching really fast. The open windows of 'Devil May Cry' sent in blows of chilly wind in waves which made Dante shiver every now and then.

Just then the front door banged open noisily---BANG!---and Virgil marched in carrying two brown paper bags in each arm, sure enough Virgil was at the grocery store.

"I'm home" he called out flatly

"Virgil!" Dante rushed over to his older brother carrying the essay paper. "I was waiting for you! Where have you been!"

"I was at work, dear brother" Virgil replied rather solemnly.

"Work?" Dante exploded into laughter. "You work? Since when? And how come I don't know about it?" he questioned, folding his arms.

Virgil frowned at him "Of course, how could you…"he paused for a second and sighed "…when you don't even give a damn about you brother!" Virgil snapped at Dante. This wasn't the first time Virgil said that sentence, Dante had been hearing it since three months ago when they escaped from the mysterious tower (which isn't mysterious anymore) that materialized magically near Dante's office. They could still see the ruins of temen-ni-gru from the rusty framed window of the apartment.

That certain phrase caused Dante's eyes to widen in surprise "Hey, wait a sec here! YOURE telling ME tat I DON'T care about YOU?" he poked Virgil in the chest.

"That is exactly what I'm trying to say!" he brushed his hand off him and dropped the groceries on Dante's work desk---THUD!----

And without another word Virgil stormed past Dante who watched him with a scowl; and stomped up the rickety old stairs to their bedroom. ---BANG!---the door slammed.

Dante shrugged "Must be a bad day at work…" and then he noticed the paper in his hand; because of clutching it so tightly in rage the paper had lines on it.

"Damn it!" he tossed the paper on the floor with force and collapsed on the shabby old velvet sofa.

**2 Hours Later **

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! I'm drowning in whipped cream!" Dante woke up instantly from a dream, he was breathing hard and was heavily drenched in sweat----_whoa thank god it was just a dream_---he wiped his sweaty forehead with the back of his hand.

Pieces of the dream still floated in his head…something like Virgil shooting him with a whipped-cream-filled-bazooka-sized…shotgun? That was a REALLY weird dream; Virgil doesn't use guns in real life, Dante thought---_Oh, well dreams are always strange_---

Dante rubbed his face and got up, and then he realized he dozed off on the couch---_Virgil? Where is he?_ ---Then it hit him---_Oh yeah he's upstairs…bad mood…and all that shit_---He checked his wristwatch (9:15pm); went upstairs and turned the corroded knob of the old door----SCREECH!---the rusted hinges made a weird sound that made Dante clench his teeth. And slowly like a sly fox he peered in and what he saw left him flabbergasted.

"PINK!" Dante went like this---> oO

**2 hours ago**

---BANG!---Virgil slammed the door so hard it nearly fell out from its rusty hinges. The sight of his comfy bed made him dash towards the inviting coziness; he quickly dashed and jumped on it and pulling out his Katana from under his bed he pierced and hacked his pillow to let out his wrath "AHHHHRRRGGGGGGG!" he screamed hysterically. Virgil went all wild and started chopping his bed into pieces "AHHHHHH!" then a voice inside his head went like ' Take it easy it's just a bed'.

Virgil stopped and took a deep breath---_relax…_he told himselfwhen he was feeling better he sat on the cold hard ground since the bed was…well…destroyed; and pinched the bridge of his nose.---_Ah,Life…it can be so boring and…harsh_…_sometimes…_---Virgil let out a sad sigh and stood up he approached the worn-out closet, (which Virgil and Dante both shared) pulled it open and seeked for his…diary---_if that sneaky bastard finds out I have a diary…---_he shakes his head_---next day he would announce to the whole college!…why do I have such an immature brat for a brother…_---

He sat down on the ground and scribbled and scribbled and scribbled until his hand was aching and couldn't write anymore. Half an hour had passed when Virgil was bored of writing and then a bulb flashed over his head; it meant he had a great idea. He rushed to his closet and searched for the light-pink t-shirt his friend got him on his last b-day. ---_I never had the chance to wear this…because of my stupid idiot brother…_---

Virgil loved the girly shirt a lot and he decided to try it on; why not? In fact Dante must have dozed off and he knew well that he should first knock instead of rushing in like an idiot or else…

Virgil stood in front of the full-length mirror and took off his blue shirt; then he slipped the disgustingly pink shirt over his head and straightened it; the shirt was oozing geekiness…He admired himself in the mirror and tried several different actions…

"Virgil, you're H –O -T…HOT!" Virgil licked his finger and placed it on his bum "sssssssssss…

"PINK!" Out of the blue a familiar voice came from behind Virgil which made him turn his attention towards the bedroom doorway. Sure enough his younger brother was peeking through the old door which was slightly ajar; with a shocked expression on his face.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!" Virgil growled.

"What does it look like…?" Dante pushed the door open wide and spreading his arms he finished his sentence "I was spying on you of course!" like it was most obvious.

Virgil glowered at him.

Dante studied Virgil carefully from head to toe and a torrent of laughter poured out from his mouth; and started to laugh hysterically.

"Yyoouu---hahha-ah look…ridic—ri ridicolus!HAHAHHAHHAHH" He gasped between the laughter; intentionally banging his fist on the door----THUD! THUD! THUD!

Virgil just glowered at him.

"AHAHHAHHHHHHHAAAA!" the scornful laughter went on and on and on and on

Virgil still glowered.

"HHAHHA---Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…" finally Dante took a deep breath "Okay, I'm finished" Dante replied, wiping a fake tear. Taking a look at Virgil, up and down again and gave him a wide goofy grin.

"Thank you" Virgil responds derisively and walked past Dante and down the stairs to the kitchen.

Dante shrugged and darted down the steps to the kitchen following his brother; he found him pillaging the small yellow fridge. The kitchen was really, only three people could fit inside, and then again there were only two people living here so it was not much of a problem.

"So, how's it going?" Dante asked casually leaning beside the wooden counter.

Virgil slammed the fridge hard and turned his head to Dante, who was standing behind him.

Dante sniggered at his girly pink shirt which was certainly tight on his muscular frame.

"Well, I am going out" he answered gravely

"Really? Right now? Where?"

"I'm going out, as if on a date you idiot!"

"Oh, so that means no demon-hunting tonight and no watching TV together?"

"Yes and yes"

"Nooooo! Why? But why?"

"Because I'm going out on a date, dimwit! I just told you a second ago!"

"Oooohhh, I see" Dante rubbed his chin.

"Yes, so follow me to the bedroom" Virgil took long strides and started upstairs.

"BEDROOM! Wha—"

"Just be quiet and do what I say" he snapped

"Oh, okay" Dante agreed and followed behind Virgil.

**In The Bedroom**

"Sooooo…What was it you wanted to ask me?" Dante asked casually, leaning against the door and brushing his silky white hair from his eyes.

Virgil ignored him, rummaged in the closet; tossing out all the clothes which now made an enormous pile on the floor. Eventually, Dante got tired and also sat on the ground, beside him, yawning.

Finally after five long minutes, Virgil pulled out several ties from his wardrobe.

"Ooooooh, what's that?" Dante asked eagerly eyeing the ties as if they were candy.

Virgil rolled his icy blue eyes at Dante and ignored his stupid question "Dante, help me choose a tie for my date tonight…"

Dante looked astounded "You trust moi style?"

"Shut up and tell me if I should go with this Bunny Tie that says, "I'm cuddly"..." Virgil shoved the Bunny tie in his face. Dante picked it up and quickly scrutinized it…sure enough it had a picture of adorable fuzzy white bunny rabbit on it.

Dante scratched his head "Bunny rabbits? Nah, I don't like 'em they're too cute."

Vergil continued without hesitation "The Golfer's Tie that says, "I'm athletic"…Or the Animal Print that says, "I'm wild"?" Virgil waited anxiously for Dante's reply.

"Ummm…"Dante started digging in the pile of clothes "How about this one?" he suggested

"The Clip-On that screams, "I'm a Geek"!" Dante scoffed and with that he collapsed on the floor and with laughter he started banging his fist on the ground…yet again.

Virgil examined the tie he tossed him; it was pink and yellow striped AND dorky. "Grrrrrrr…" a snarl escaped his mouth…That was it, Virgil couldn't take it any more, he went insane all of a sudden and with absolute fury he lunged at Dante. Virgil started strangling Dante frantically

"ACCKKKK! STOP KILLING ME YOU RETARD!" Dante yelled continuously. "Stop it! Stop It! STOP ITTT, AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Dante constantly kept struggling.

"Or what? What will YOU do you—you—you pesky lil' pipsqueak—you!" Virgil stuttered enraged; Virgil sat on top of Dante and strangled him and choked him and thwacked his head hard on the cold floor, again and again and again---THACKKKK!THACKKK!

"OWWWW! STOP IT OR MY HEAD WILL CRACK AND AND AND MY ---BRAINS WILL POP OUTTT!AHHHHHH!" Dante screamed at the top of his lungs; still struggling and kicking furiously at Virgil. The mighty weight of Virgil pinned him down to the floor real good.

"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY BRAINS YOU DUMBASS!" Virgil reminded him.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!I'M GONNA TELL MOM!" Dante shrieked in his ear then with a powerful force he kicked Virgil in the ass and awkwardly limped out the room. Virgil was left stunned and started rubbing his ear in which Dante yelled. Virgil stood up also limping and with a shaky hand on his hip he stumbled to the doorway, through which Dante went off.

In the Meantime, breathing hard Dante rushed down the stairs and darted towards his work table; to the black old-fashioned telephone and with his heart thudding loudly in his chest he quickly dialed in Eva's cell phone number.

"I'M COMING TO GET YOU, DANTE!" Virgil roared from the bedroom.

Dante's eyes were glued on the upstairs doorway. He could see a pink-shirted Virgil stumbling on the doorway.

"Come on tele! Quick…Quick…quick…quick…" Dante chanted.

Beep…Beep…Beep…; one bell two bells, three bells…

"Hello?" answered a female voice

"HELLO! HELLO! Mom, mommy is that YOU?" he shouted in the phone

"Oh, I'm sorry, this is Helen. Eva's in the changing room, you're Dante right?"

"Listen lady! I NEED to talk to my MOM!RIGHT NOW!" Dante growled.

"But your--- -beep beep beep beep…" went the line.

"What the--?" Dante gasped in horror; it took him a whole minute to realize that a finger was placed on the 'cut-button' and that finger belonged to a certain someone---

Dante gulped and looked up at---Virgil!

"Im gonna getcha!" was the last thing Dante heard Virgil said.

"YYYAAHHHHHHHH!" Dante dashed around and around the room finding the front door; when he finally found it he yanked it open and without glancing back he swiftly fled out into the cold starless night.

**Caffeine **(an hour later)

"Man, my bro is insane…" Dante declared and took a sip from his cappuccino. The moonlight streamed in through the long windows of the small orangey café. The surroundings of this place made Dante feel a lot comfortable; not a glimpse of a spiky white hairdo guy lurking around in the darkness, waiting for the right minute to strangle him. All was quiet and peaceful, just what he preferred at the moment…

"What did he do now?" the bartender shook his head; he heard that a thousand times already. This certain bartender was his ol' chum, a friend, a certain someone who he could spill his beans to.

"He chased me…out of my own apartment…" Dante sighed miserably

"Most probably you must have done something wrong" he stated, wiping the wooden counter.

Dante took another long sip from his delicious hot frothy cappuccino "I? What did I do?" he said with a slight angry tone "I didn't do ANYTHING wrong!" he snarled.----CLANK!----He dropped the empty mug on the wooden counter expressing a little annoyance. But today the ol chum didn't look like the one he should confide to, because he refused to take Dante's side and that bothered him like hell.

"Bob, you're no use!" he declared, putting on his black leather jacket hastily "I'm outta here! Peace out, dude!" with that he walked out the shiny glass double front doors and stepped out into the night.

Not a soul was in sight, even the stars were asleep and the Moon hung low like it was pulled by someone closer to Earth with a lasso. Not a single sound was head until………

……………CRASH!

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Well, It took me a long time to write this one! Although it wasn't funny I promise ill make the next one worth reading…

Please don't forget to Review and

love ya'll and thanks 4 'wasting' ur time here:P


	3. The Unexpected Phone Call

Disclaimer: I do not own DMC or any of its characters. I only own my made up characters, yo:D

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**...Chapter Three...**

**The unexpected Phone call**

A shiny red motorbike zoomed in and crashed through the dumpster then skidded into a halt in front of Dante. He stood unsurprised, as he saw the driver was a lady and 'Lady'.

"Whoa there, pretty chica! Whatcha doin here?" he tried to act cool. Of course, Dante would never miss the chance to look cool whenever a girl was around.

The motorbike's headlight dimmed as Lady jumped down and moved towards Dante.

"None of your beeswax" she snapped and went inside the small Café.

"Hey, wait up!" he stumbled into the Caffeine as well.

**Caffeine**…again

"How about I buy you a drink?" Dante offered just as Lady took a seat.

"Sure…if you have money" she said.

"A 'pink flamingo' for the pretty chick here" He ordered Bob.

"'Pink flamingo'! Ugh, I hate that one!" Lady exclaimed, disgusted.

"Oh sorry… how about 'Pink Lady' then?" Dante adds with a smirk.

"No thanks, I'd rather have a plain old Pina Colada instead" she replied

"Sure, A plain old Pina Colada, Bob!"

Dante then turned his attention to Lady and stares into her eyes with his own icy blues, Lady suddenly felt really uncomfortable, well, she always feels uneasy when 'HE' was around…

"So, what are you doing here?" Lady asked to break the ice.

"Oh, I just got into a fight with my bro and…" Dante didn't had the chance to finish his sentence when Lady cried out "What! Again!"

"Well…You see it happened like this…

Dante explained the whole story of what happened today while Lady was slowly nodding off now and then. A whole hour had passed while Dante went on and on and on…

"…And then we chased this ice-cream truck but the driver got, like all crazy 'n stuff so we decided to…uh…Lady?" Finally Dante noticed that Lady wasn't paying attention because she had dozed off with her arms crossed on the counter and had her head down.

"Uh, Lady? Lady?" Dante called "Lady!" this time he said it out loud and shook her from the shoulders.

"Hmmmm…" she just slept without hesitation.

Just then Dante noticed Bob coming out from the kitchen double doors, he decided to ask bob about Lady "Bob, what the hell did cha put in that pina colada?" he asked in an angry tone.

Bob looked over at Lady and said "The drink-mixer accidentally put sleeping pills in the drink instead of pineapple cubes, I guess…"

"WHAT! What kinda drink-mixer is he!" Dante stood up from his chair enraged.

"Hmmm, the stupid kind…"Bob muttered and went back inside the kitchen.

Dante tsked then checked the orange wall clock (4:00a.m!) He had to go back to his apartment because if he didn't get there soon enough Virgil would be calling Sparda and complaining him about how spoiled Dante is and of course Sparda would take Virgil's side, after all he is the one who's like their dad.

--- _Oh, shit_----Dante thought---_Maybe I should leave her here and go home…but that would be ditching!---_He glanced at Lady, she was sleeping peacefully, there was no way she would wake up cause no matter how hard Dante yelled or shook her she would refuse to wake up.

_Oh well, then again I should, because she also ditched me when I was in the ice cavern_…-----

And with that thought still swarming in his head he darted out the front door.

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Dante was heavily drenched in rain when he finally arrived at his apartment. The Neon Devil May Cry sign made Dante a little comfortable and he sighed "There's no place like home…"

Dante made his way to the front door, hesitated a while and turned the knob to enter the apartment where Virgil would be waiting inside like a hot chili pepper about to burst into flames.

"Let's get this over with…"he muttered under his breath. The door made that teeth-clenching sound when Dante pushed it open. His heart race a mile per minute. ----_It's now or never_…----he thought.

Darkness surrounded him completely just as he stepped inside. Without a clue the door slammed shut behind him making him jump a mile in the air.

"Good grief! I'm Dante the coolest Demon Hunter! Why the hell am I so scared?" accidentally Dante said it out loud. Loud enough for the creatures of the dark to hear. Loud enough for Virgil's ears. Virgil who now switched on the lights.

"Well, well, well…if it isn't my cheesy little brother…"

Dante looked over his shoulder to see a smirking Virgil behind him. "Cheesy?" he pouted.

"Ha ha aha hahahah…" Virgil let out an evil laugh. "Doors don't slam shut by themselves, you buffoon" he laughed again.

"I know…" Dante muttered thinking the door really did slam shut by itself.

"The only thing you're afraid of is your Big ol' brother, isn't it?" Virgil said with a sneer.

"Nope! Me ain't scared of nothin!" Dante pretended to be cool and flopped down on the couch, turning on the TV.

Virgil quickly snatched the remote from Dante's clutch and instantly pressed the 'OFF' button. "Four thirty-five in the morning and you're watching TV! Go to bed, Dante or else I'll call dad and tell him you ditched me then came back at five in the morning!" he yelled at him.

"Alright, alright, alright…Mom…" Dante jeered and dashed upstairs howling with laughter before Virgil could grab him and fist him again.

* * *

"Sundays…"Virgil murmured sleepily "I hate Sundays…" Virgil checked the bed-stand calendar and quickly went back to sleep because he knew that Dante might be up and ready to wake him up as well.

**Outside the bedroom**

"1…2…" Dante counted under his breath and on the number "…3!" he kicked down the door, sprinted inside and jumped onto his bed…where Virgil was sleeping, since his bed was…in pieces Dante decided to lend him his bed for only a night.

Dante jumped up and down on the bed trying his best to wake him up; then he planned to shout into Virgil's ear…because it always worked…but he would get a good fisting from Virgil afterwards. But Dante decided to take the risk…

"YO! Mornin' Mornin' Mornin' People!" Dante yelled in his ear "The crows are up, a sign that you should be up too, sweepy-butt!" he spanked Vergil's booty and leaped off the bed before Vergil could react.

"Hmmphhh" Virgil groaned angrily but made no effort to sock him because if he did, they might get into a fight and he wouldn't be able to sleep by then.

"Strike One!" Dante yelled in triumph "Bahahahhhhhahhhhahhahhahahhhahaaaaa!" suddenly Dante exploded into deep laughter; he laughed so hard that his face went all red and then he started coughing uncontrollably; choking on a small dust particle…most probably…

"That's what you get for waking someone up so early!" Virgil retorted and covered his head with a pillow, preparing to go back to sleep.

"Wa—ter---wat-er, I nee-eed—wate—r—Im—choo—choking!" Dante hurriedly rushed downstairs to the kitchen. On the way downstairs, Dante heard the phone ringing, but as he was coughing he decided to have a drink first. He went to the kitchen, pulled open the fridge, found a filthy dusty water bottle. He was taking a gulp; all the while the phone was ringing continusly.----wh_o the hell could that be? Ringing so early in the morning!_----

"GET THE PHONE, DANTE!" Virgil roared from upstairs.

"Okay…okay…okay…"Dante muttered and went towards the phone, picking it up.

"WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG!" Yelled the other line, whoever it was, sounded a lot like Virgil.

"Well, I was in the kitchen having a drink!" Dante declared

"What were you drinking, boy? It better not be something alcoholic!" went the anonymous caller.

"I was just drinking wate---Wait a minute! I don't need to confess to a stranger! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?" Dante screamed furiously.

"PIPE IT DOWN! WILL YA!" Virgil bellowed again from above.

Dante groaned irritably. All this Virgil's bellowing was driving them insane! "Who are you!" He asked the stranger again.

"I'll give you a hint: Your Dad" the line went silent waiting for Dante's reply

"Hmmm…Can I have one more hint?" Dante asked

"Oh lord, Come on son! I'm your father!"

"Father!...I don't believe YOU!" Dante yelled the last word

"Oh boy…" Sparda muttered

"If you really are my father, then tell me the secret code!"

Sparda sighed, shaking his head.

"YAYYYY! Dad, it really is you!"

"Hmmm…"on the other line Sparda groaned and rolled his eyes

"Soooo, when are you coming, dad? Where's mom? Can I talk to her? Where are you guys anyway? Where you guys staying? How's Hawaii? Can we come too? You know what yesterday I called mom but mom didn't pick up---

"STOP!" Sparda roared "I just want to tell you that we are coming tomorrow, and that's it!"

Dante went silent

"And I'll answer all the questions tomorrow…" Sparda added just to cheer Dante up.

"YAAYYYYYY! Thanks Dad!"

"Okay son, I need to talk to Virgil now…"

"Uhh, but Virgil's sleeping"

"Still! It's twelve in the noon, boy! Wake him up!"

"Dad, I tried to wake him up but he refused!" Dante complained

Sparda was quiet for a while, he appeared to be thinking then said "Okay then, let him sleep…I'll call later…Goodbye son!"

"Bye, Daddio!"

After putting down the phone Dante's face twisted into a frown "Hmph, let him sleep, let him sleep, let him sleep!" he mimicked Sparda "He'll get a big fat round bum if he gets to sleep a lot!"

With nothing better to do Dante decided to check what's on the T.V. After switching from channel to channel, the phone started to ring again---RING! RING!RRIINNGGG!---

"Oh lord, who is it now?" Dante groaned he felt so lazy he had no will to get up, walk over to the desk, pick up the phone, and answer it. So, he let it ring…and dozed off…

**Several Hours Later**

Dante was instantly awoken when he felt his cell-phone vibrating in his jeans side-pocket, since the phone was on silent. He wiped his sweaty forehead and taking out the phone from his pocket he saw that he received a message from an unknown number. He read it under his breath slowly and this is what it said:

_Hey, Come over to 59 Gothika Avenue, _

_I have important issues to talk about, demon hunter!_

_Be there at 10:00 p.m. sharp!_

_Don't be late or else…_

"Gothika Avenue!" Dante gasped horrified. Gothika Avenue was the most deadly place in the world. Nobody dared to go there at night…not even vampires…But nothing could stop Dante. He was a little freaked out…but for gods sake he's a demon hunter!

"I'm a demon hunter! I ain't afraid of some so-called haunted street!" Dante stood up and crossed the small room to the yellow tiled, dirty kitchen.

"…But a hero gotta eat first!" with shifty eyes he glanced around the room making sure Virgil is absent, then pulled out a container. Dante flipped open the lid and lifted a small, round choco-fudge brownie from the inside.

"Mmmmmmm…Choco-licious…come to papa…" he took a large bite, just as the lights switched on.

"Dante!" a voice called his name from behind him.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed it! Stay tuned for more craziness! Please don't forget tah review, yo! Ta-ta!Thanks for reading!

Dante: By the way, people…Keep it coo'! (thumbs up)

Virgil: Arrghhh! (slaps forehead)


End file.
